Angry Child

It’s a very common now a days. Children are becoming mature early. Screen exposure has got a very important role on childhood behavior. Its not good to handle childhood anger with anger there are lots of ways to tackle angry child.

Understanding Your kid, Yourself, and the Situation

There is a difference between experiencing a feeling and displaying emotions, such as a temper tantrum. Anger usually follows the belief that we can't get what we want, or that we are powerless in a situation. It can also be a cover-up for hurt feelings. Children who seem angry may be frustrated with their parents, other children, themselves, life, or other people who are angry with them. Children usually have good reasons for feeling angry, even if they don't know what those reasons are. When children are bossed and controlled and have no choices, they will probably feel angry. Children who are overprotected often feel angry. If adults abuse children either physically or verbally, children will feel angry. Parents often respond to anger with more control and intimidation, making the situation worse. If you or your child feels angry, there may be a power struggle going on, and it is important to disengage from the power contest and work for cooperation.

Few tips to tackle angry child:

1. Say to your child, "You're really angry. It's okay to feel angry, but can you tell me in words instead of actions who or what you are angry with?" Wait for the child's response and listen with interest instead of saying, "You shouldn't be angry."

2. Sometimes children can't identify their feelings when they are upset. Let your child know it is okay to wait awhile, and to talk with you as soon as he is ready.

3. You can help you child defuse her anger by finding out (perhaps through guessing) what she wants and helping her obtain it, such as, "You're angry because your sister gets to stay up later and you wish you could, too. When you are her age, you'll be able to stay up as late as she does."

4. Don't choose sides when your children fight. Tell them, "Kids, I see you are having a hard time working this out. You can take some time to cool off and try again later, or you can both finish this fight somewhere else, or you can work it out here, but I'm not taking sides."

5. If you have children who argue, try letting them have the last word or hugging them instead of arguing back. Ask your children for their opinions instead of telling them what to do. When you recognize a power struggle, stop and say, "I don't want to control you, but I would appreciate your help. Let's see what we can work out after we calm down."

How to prevent future problems:

1. Set up family meetings so your children know there is a place and time each week where they can talk about the things that bother them, be listened to, and solve problems if needed.

2. Use limited choices with younger children instead of telling them what to do.

3. Set up a routine, so that the routine is the boss and not you. Children respond better to "It's time for dinner" than "I want you to come to the table now." 

4. When your child is in a good mood, mention that you notice she is often angry and ask for her help to think of a way she could show her anger that won't hurt anyone. Suggest a pillow she can punch, or listening to a tape of her favorite music, or finding a special cooling-off place

5. If you are a single parent, avoid any derogatory comments about your children's other parent. Do not expect your children to take the place of another adult.

6. Don't be afraid of your own anger. Anger is an important feeling that warns you of possible abuse--physical and emotional. Learn to say, "I'm angry." You provide a good model for your children when you express those feelings in words, instead of with displays of temper